5:00am wakeup call after a sleepless night with a sleepless and fussy baby.
With tired eyes, I see pumpkin pancakes spiraling across the kitchen and swirling all over the high chair and the floor.
I’ve done 3 diaper changes and 1 outfit change.
I’m washing dishes and bottles and scrubbing impossibly orange high chairs and floors.
I’ve read 10 books with a tiny one safely in my lap.
I’ve folded 2 loads of laundry, with one pile knocked over by little hands.
My coffee is brewed and sitting idly in the pot.
It’s getting cold. Always cold.It’s not even 9 am.
Tired and exhausted, I wonder what my purpose is.
Here’s the thing: even when we feel physically drained and incapable, God is not. He can energize our weary souls and pour life into our empty hearts. Whatever season of life you are in is not an accident. Whether you are drowning in work projects, struggling in your marriage, or adjusting to motherhood, God has strategically mapped out your daily blueprints for His glorification. When you are doubting and questioning and feeling altogether unequipped to handle things, remember that God’s grace is brand new everyday. In our tendency to compare ourselves to others and feel grossly inadequate, God meets us there and fills us with hope and joy to care for the demands before us.
Some days are physically, emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually draining. With a little perspective shift, though, we can see what a GIFT it is to tend to the people and needs in front of us, praising God in the process.
But what about this overwhelming tendency to question our calling and our purpose? Late at night, alone with our thoughts, we can start to wonder if we are doing anything worthwhile.
“Let me live to tell the people of this age what your strength has accomplished. To tell about your power to all who will come.”-Psalm 71:18 [God’s Word Translation]
We are constantly wandering around with our eyes closed in pursuit of “purpose”. Searching and seeking, we are desperate to find our “calling” and understand our place in life. Contrary to the messages you may be hearing, your purpose isn’t something you need to dig deep to discover. It isn’t hidden or difficult to find. It will not take years to uncover, after a long movie-esque experience of soul-searching.
Your purpose is this:-To know and love God, to listen to His voice, and to do whatever He commands.
Regardless of your life season or current responsibilities, your purpose is unwavering.
Knowing and loving anything else will leave us feeling empty and hollow. Listening to other voices around will steer us off course. Doing what the world commands will only separate us from the savior.
“With joy you will draw water from the springs of salvation.”-Isaiah 12:3
Let us fight against welcoming a spirit of bondage, enslaved to fulfilling the purposes the world tells us to pursue. Instead let’s long to embrace the purposes God has aligned for His daughters. We need to be desperate to find springs of comfort in His living water, considering His desires to be our delight. As we learn to embrace His purpose, we will desire to know Him deeper, letting go of the sweet whispers of distraction all around.
Craving His presence and allowing His spirit to overtake us, we are able to love no matter how we are loved back. A desire will pool inside of our souls to share His love with everyone, regardless if our flesh thinks they deserve it or not.
But how quickly we can let all of this slip away. We get in the way of ourselves.The biggest thing that prevents us from plunging headfirst into His purpose for our lives is us. We are selfish, so easily distracted, full of worry, lacking faith, ruled by emotion, swayed by society, and altogether broken.
We cannot accomplish His purpose unless we recognize our deep need for Him. Our brokenness and sin is precisely what should be prompting us to draw near to His living water yet again. He leads us back to Him each time. In our wandering and forgetting, He reminds us that His mercy, grace, and compassion never run dry. His love is steadfast even when our love for Him is shaky. His love stretches wide, even when we seem on fire for Him only for an instant, quickly getting pulled away by false comforts and fulfillments.
God has asked us to honor Him with our words, our actions, our relationships, our possessions- to pursue Him in all that we do from sun-up until sun-down. That is our purpose. We have nothing to offer Him, yet He offers himself to us moment by moment.
Will we choose His purpose or choose the empty pleasures around us?
Jesus, help us desire to trade these ashes into beauty and wear forgiveness like a crown.
Lord, I want desperately to be a woman that yearns to be in your presence and doesn’t assess her worth based on performance or even service, but draws her strength and peace from your eternal well that never runs dry. I want to be a woman that is content to be your daughter, always getting to know your heart more, constantly desiring less of myself. Jesus, help me to be a woman who never gets bored of your word and never grows tired of communing with you in prayer.
Jesus, it’s amazing that even in the gospels you turned NO ONE away. You healed and loved all who came to you. You were passionate about moving around and sharing the word with all people, regardless if it was convenient or comfortable.
Lord, Help me do this in my daily life. How can I not long for you? How can I not long to be with you? You bring peace where there is only chaos. You shed bright light where theres is only darkness.
Your love covers many sins. Without your love, your peace, your forgiveness- what hope is there? What purpose is there?
Help me to not chase after empty fulfillment, false promises, or distractions that push their way in front of you. Even in circles of other believers it is getting harder and harder to truly lay aside fleshly desire and wordly pursuit and wholeheartedly strive after you.
I want to be a woman marked by my pursuit of you. I desire to fix my eyes upon you, placing my whole confidence on your truths and commands, never looking back to count what I’ve lost and never welcoming burdens and worries back into my heart. I don’t want to turn away from you. Help me to remain close.
Wife to Simon and mama to Theodore Samuel. Hannah began her walk with Christ at age 17 and He is radically reshaping her world daily. She find so much joy in coffee cup conversations with other women at her home, serving alongside her husband at our church’s middle/high school youth group, exploring new cities, cozy days with a book, decorating/reorganizing, filling journals with brightly-colored pens, hand-writing notes on pretty stationary and time at the beach.